So effing in between

A close friend of mine once said she could never crush on, let alone marry, a KA because they are "so effing in-between."

I feel ya.

But I think I can also feel what the KA feels.

And it's true, they are so fucking in-between.

And sometimes it pains both sides. 

I asked a KA attorney out for lunch (finally! should have done that a lot earlier. anyways, happened to meet him in the elevator on the way to the office yesterday morning, otherwise i would have ended up never talking to him!) to ask him for career advice,

and yes, he's a partner at a well-known and successful (albeit small) firm, and he makes good money by handling cases worth LOTS and LOTS of money (shipping companies as clients rock!), and he's been listed on the International Who's Who for his work and all,

but... he's the only KA in the office, in a firm of about 15 attorneys (and about as much nonlegal/paralegal personnel), the only one whose mother tongue isn't Korean, the only one who didn't grow up in Korea.

I wonder what he likes about working here, living here. I mean, he must be doing it because it's better in SOME way than staying in the US.

Well, during lunch it looked like it was a possible (and somewhat available) career path, and he seemed to be quite satisfied with his life.

But it really struck me during the company dinner ("회식"), especially at 2차 (which the founding partner so wisely and generously decided not to join)

that he could be, 

really, REALLY lonely.

There we were, a group of about 10 lawyers and 2 lawyers-to-be, drinking and joking and laughing the night away,

and we were sitting on opposite ends of a long table,

and he kept looking at me with a look that looked, to me, like he wanted to say, 

"Please, please come here and talk to me..."

Sure everyone had had a few drinks (some had many) by then, but I had none,

and it looked,... almost,... erotic, the way he was looking at me.

Yes, yes, it might just be me. I might be projecting my desires on something that has no factual basis and I might be the one who WANTED him to look at me that way.

(Rumor has it that the people at the firm next door voted on "who's the hottest attorney at [my firm]?" and the KA attorney ranked 1st place. And Atty. Hwang, who is a man in his fifties but resembles 김태희, took 2nd place. ..... the things these people do.... no wonder 찌라시s always start in 증권가.. I'm sure the 법률 바닥 is the second destination)

Anyhow, so that was 2차. And most people left after that, but some people wanted to stick around for 3차, and at that point I asked him, "Are you heading back or are you joining us?" 

and he said, "This is the GREAT time." 

So I took that to mean, 'the party's only starting', and that he would go to 3차 with us. 

And all of us were just sort of standing there on the street, trying to figure out where to go next, 

and then the next minute, I turned around to look for him, and he was gone!!!

WTH?????

And yes, shortly after writing something like this I will go to his office and say goodbye, thank you, 'twas nice meeting you, keep in touch and all those niceties.. The nerve of me. Haha.