20대 남자는 우스워 보여

After two consecutive crushes on 39-year-old men,

I've come to the realization that I simply cannot take men in their 20s seriously.

And speculate that I will get married sometime in my late 30s, with someone who is also in his late 30s or early 40s...................................

I'm not one of those people who are dying to get married before reaching 30,

and I don't have a longing to have a child/children,

but I do worry that if I find a man that I genuinely love and respect and want to spend my life with, I might also start wanting to have a child with him.

And then my mom's brainwashing that began around when I turned 20 chimes in: "If you're not going to have kids, it doesn't matter when you get married. But if you do want kids, you should have them as early as possible. You should definitely have your first child before you're 30."

Hmm.

What a dilemma.

Would this be any easier if I'd already met the man of my dreams? I don't think so.

Back home.. with a crush on a Catholic priest!

geez I never imagined this would happen... but it has.

I know this will go away with the "out of sight, out of mind" therapy, but I will definitely miss him and think of him very often for the next few weeks/month/months.

He has a beautiful, low voice (handsome men with low voices make my knees wobble)

He's tall - 183 cm. (how lovely it was when he hugged me.. wish he would have held me tighter.. oh come on.. what the heck am I thinking???)

(*the hugging was part of the program - he hugged every single one of us. so don't use your imagination there)

He sings beautifully and plays the guitar very well, too. (men that play a mean guitar/cello/piano make my heart ache)

His sermons were so well prepared and really rekindled my faith.

아주그냥 듬직하게 생기셔가지고는 처녀가슴 설레게 하시기는 ㅠㅠㅠㅠ 에잇!!!

If only he wasn't a priest I would have........................ nah.

He's way too satisfied with and proud of his life as it is.

He explained why he never considered any other life than that of a priest, and why he chose that life over getting married and raising a family (dammit! Yoyoyo, I didn't even ask, it was part of his sermon!). 훌쩍 ㅠㅠ