20190629

1. Yeah I know it's not going to work out. I knew all along that pursuing it would lead to both our ruin.

2. Could I ever? Do I have the mental rigor that the job requires?

3. So am I going to be stuck forever? Is this as far as I can go? Is it going to be a stumbling block for the rest of my life? Should I just adjust my expectations to a more 'realistic' level?

But really, is there a way out of this?